Charlie Down

Today I had to write my name. Writing ones name is quite the accomplishment. Remember when you were too young to know what an idiot you were? And you drew vast masterpieces and wrote volumes of literature, only to discover, while beginning school, that everything you knew was wrong.

You were not smart. You knew nothing. You had to start all the way over. And what do they teach you right off? Your name. This is who you are. This is what you are. You can write your name, and you will, over and over again.

Pretty soon you are churning out sheet after sheet of your own bloody name. Where before you would manufacture thousands of sheets of beauty and creativity, now it was all two words, that had no meaning, written carefully, calmly, methodically upon the paper.

You don’t realize it, but you will write these two words the most out of any other combination of two words in your life. I had to do that today. I had to sign a little sheet of paper that said that the letter I wrote was inappropriate. That I had created an incident. I had to acknowledge that I was guilty. Yes, I did it. I wrote a letter. And I’m guilty. God love Free Speech.

I need some good Freedom Fighters. Where’s my running crew? Yoo hoo, running crew. There are no Freedom Fighters, so I had to cheer myself up. Here’s what I did.

Picture [ Charlie Brown ]. Just see him sitting there under the tree staring at the clouds. See him chat with his friends.

Now, [ stab ] [ stab ] him in the back of the head. Picture the knife quickly and violently entering the back of his skull. Maybe even a little bit pokes out of his eye, or his cheek, or the back of his throat.

You see this [ emoticon ]? Ok. You know what this emoticon is of? This is the face that Charlie makes right at that knife makes contact. Before he blanks. Before the blood loss puts him out. Before he stops breathing and his brain shuts down.

Isn’t that the funniest thing ever? I laughed so hard. Cause you know he’s saying [ “Oh Brother” ] even as knife cuts the major nerves in his brain, severing the most basic, but most important, nervous information highways.

Today Jeff and Carl and I went to iHop to eat with Lacey and Kari who had downed about 2.4 gallons of coffee (and 6 times that amount of half-and-half) waiting for us. It was about a 20 minute wait. These girls are hardcore addicts.

I wasn’t real impressed with the waitress. She seemed to be a drop-out of some sorts, but she was way older than the normal institutions (high school, college). Maybe she’s an overall, general, life drop-out. I think she used to be a man.

We sat and chatted. We had a good time, laughed a lot (a natural aphrodisiac), and then … well. ;) Yada yada yada, I’m ready for bed.