Your Really Do Need A System

I put some of my favorite pictures from the August 05 photoshoot up on deviantART.

These are pictures that I submitted as is:

Man. The acting in Jurassic Park III is atrocious. It’s just so ackward. And I had read somewhere that the director had hoped that it would be the best Jurassic Park. Yet, watching it, the computer graphics are worse than the original.

You have to wonder if a creature as big as that would even consider humans to be worth running down. They can’t be very filling to eat. I would think that they would rather have a nice big T-Rex or any of the browsing herbivores, the brontosaurus for instance.

Okay. Back to this crappy movie, the raptors aren’t acting “realistically” at all. I just watched a raptor grip a man’s head in his mouth and then snap his neck before leaving. Wouldn’t it be crueler to leave the man shredded and bloody? And why didn’t their razor-sharp teeth leave any marks in his head? Just bite his head off.

I think that they were trying really hard to recapture the wide-eyed innocence and discover of the first movie. There are a lot of “omgAwesome” moments. And then somehow these 6 adults (including the Dr. Alan Grant) can hardly do as well as a 14 year old boy. A boy who has lived on that island for 2 months.

You know what’s even worse? I heard that Michael Crichton has been asked to “at least come up with a story for” Jurassic Park IV. Sometimes Hollywood gives me the shivers.

Pteradactyls. Those things were supposed to be in the first movie. There’s a whole scene in the book involving them. In the book, Grant and the kids are on a raft floating down the river, which just happens to go to the aviary. The problem with pteradactyls is that they turned out to be extremely territorial. Having not paid much attention, I don’t remember which island III takes place on, but they did escape out of the aviary by river, so maybe they’re on Isla Nublar.

And then there’s the T-Rex unicorn dinosaur. Of course. Oh, and Elly manages to convince two branches of the armed forces to go to a Costa Rican island on no hard evidence that there is anything wrong or that he’s even there. She just gets this watery, screamy phonecall. Of course. And then we get another helicopter / going home shot at the end. And, the divorced mom and dad get back together. Of course.

Forget it. I’m putting in Memento. The menu system is just as frustrating at JPIII, but the payoff is much bigger. Plus, there’s a guide on Christopher Nolan’s website.

…if you’re going to make it work.