So one day I was minding my own business when Bill suddenly addresses me.

“David, your gonna need to play for me tonite. I have too much homework to do”

I replied, “Yeah, I got your back you busy guy.”

Then, 1 hour before gametime, I took the liberty of going to bed and falling asleep.

The next thing I know I”m being woken up by one of the players on the team, Caitlins roomate, Amy Zerfus.

“Davy, its time to go”

“Wha?” – I reply with complete dumbfoundedness.

Amy – “I need to go to my room and get some things so talk to clayton and bear and see if they are ready to go and meet me downstairs.”

Well, i did that. Mission accomplished. We all carpooled down to the gym in her Neon. We had to be careful of her dress she has to wear at work- she works at a clothing store- for Prom.  Green.  One of the guys riding with us actually is going to go get a red bowtie from her sometime soon. I know you all need to know that. Once there our basketball teamed assembled and we watched other games finish up.

Turns out this game is a playoff game so losers go home crying. I was sick of crying so I was going to try hard to be a winner. Time for the Secret Weapon to unleash his weapons of secrecy. We had about 5 minutes to shoot around before the game so I stepped on the court feeling the juices of excellence flow. My confidence was high and my commitment unshakeable as I received the ball for the first warm-up shot. I cocked the ball, jumped into the air, and released the ball in one smooth flow. Let me tell you my dissapointment and partial embarassement when, not only did i not get close to the rim, I did not even come remotely close to touching the net.

You know how some people can really attract attention for how good they do things. They perform incredible feats nobody has ever seen. Well, I turned heads with my ability to perform astonishing feats of airballing while trying. Now, you might say, David, if your airballing it, step in a couple steps. Start closer and work your way out – baby steps. Well, right you are people thinking that, but i was already at least 5-8 feet inside the three-point line. Any closer and I might as well be missing layups. I decided that I would not be shooting anything that wasn’t right under that basket.

I started out on the bench cheering on my team and trying to alter the other team’s shots with my mind.

Eventually I made it in and that’s when I noticed that step aerobics doesn’t really prepare you for lots of sprinting. The first time down the court I came around the baseline and received a pass, where I then made I nice pass to Bear in the blocks where he scored.

Assist to David.

Then on the next play or 2 on D i stole the ball and took it coast to coast. Almost. I dumped it off to a girl who scored.

People might have been cheering, and maybe not. I had been on the court for maybe a max of one minute and i felt like i was going to pass out. My head was kind of swimming and all of my muscles burned like the fires of hell on a hot summers day. Let me tell you that Hell sucks. I don’t know personally, but I’ve heard.

Also, it should be noted, that almost right away I got an offensive rebound and when I attempted to put it up it got blocked. Really badly. Just like old times. Just like everytime.

And then again on a fast break, I was a wing going down the side and the ball was passed to me as I came up to the basket. The lone defender flew past me as recieved the ball. I then took two steps and soared to the basket. I could feel the wind rushing past my ears, I could almost see the court getting smaller, and then out of nowhere, a voice from heaven or maybe I said it, I heard this voice say “WITH MY SECRET POWERS, I AM CAPTAIN PLANET!” I felt like i was flying and like i had turned blue and glassy. I decided to kiss it off the glass in a layup type fashion, when all of a sudden before the ball and glass could kiss, some guy, most likely Superman in disguise, came out of nowhere launched the ball almost into orbit. The ball landed almost on the far side of the court next to us. It was quite an amazing feat. All it meant to me was that I really wasn’t Captain Planet.

In the end, the game was won and they went home crying. We were winners and we went home not crying.

Game Over.

I’m in these clubs: the Newman Club and the Drama Club.  Well, both clubs had plans to visit assisted living homes Monday night.  I knew about the Newman Club visit before the Drama Club’s so I went with the Newman Club.  The Newman Club dropped off valentine cards and balloons for all the residents and then we sat around and chatted for a while.  We talked about life at the hall, the college, where they grew up, and the birds and the bees.  Casual stuff like that.

The Drama Club went to a different assisted living place where they performed great feats of talent.  Some people played the piano, guitar, some sang, one guy did dog tricks, and one dude was suppose to juggle.  I don’t know if he did or not because I heard he forgot to practice for it, but he does have a dog suit.  Why is that relevant? Because one time at 4 in the morning he ran into our rooms and woke us up while wearing it.  It’s a pretty sweet mascot uniform if i do say so myself.

After talking to all the people in assisted living we went to Sr. Teriseta’s apartment and had a big pizza party.  There was a ton of pizza to eat so I ate a ton of pizza because I can.  Thats the way the world works.  If there is pizza to eat you eat it. If there is more pizza than can be eaten by the people at the party, then you eat a lot of it.  I eat pizza almost 2 times a day because it is really quick and easy to get and i like it.  Most people get sick of it but not me.  I just go with the flow and right now pizza is flowing like a river of cheezy goodness.

Anyways, I left the party with a my final gestures being a wink and a kiss towards Sr. Teresita before I closed the door. I could hear everybody laughing all the way down into the entrance of the apartment building.
I went back to my dorm.


Today was the day of Corination for Ortonville.  I, being the Spring Fling King from last year, was asked to come back this year and hand off the crown/decorated ice cream bucket.  I said yes, so after my last class I hit the old dusty trail.

After Art Design 2, I went back to the dorm, got dressed, and then took off for Ortonville in my dad’s van.  Along the way I listened to bands Story of the Year, All-American Rejects, and Cursive.  The problem I thought of on the way up was that I was missing a belt.  Getting dressed up and then not wearing a belt feels really weird.  WWLD?  Well, I decided to call Chris Fellows and see if he could hook a brother up.

David,”Hey, not really important, but i was wondering if you had a belt I could wear?”

Chris, “Chuck Norris!”

David, “Uh…yeah, i heart Chuck too, but i really could use a belt to make me not feel dumb.”

Chris, “Chuck Norris!”


Then I hung up and turned my attention to the road.

Through much daydreaming, snapping out of a trance wondering when my exit is, then realizing it is right ahead of me, headbanging to music, and nailing old ladies as they cross the street in towns, I arrived in Ortonville at 6:30, 30 minutes ahead of the ceremony and with a high score of 330 points(hit 3 old ladies and a cat owned by an old lady).
When I got there I just milled around, chatted with the locals, got my mission instructions, and then when Fellows got there, I got the belt from him.  Alas, it was too big, and we couldn’t poke a hole in it, but it really wasn’t that big a deal.  I’m the King, I can where a belt or not whenever I want!

Well, Sabrina and I were the first introduced.  My crown was new this year, a bit smaller, but it still didn’t fit on my head.  After our introduction I made a decree that I would like to be called the Minister of Magic.  Well, then they introduced all the princes and princesses, then they called up all the King and Queen candidates including Karin and Kelsey.  After this the Serendipity group came on and they sang “Colors of the Wind” and they did an excellent job.   After this there was this game where the girls were asked questions about their escorts and then vise versa.  After this it was time for the main event.  The crowning.  Well, the King was Mathew Koval, a Big Stonian, and then the Queen was Rebecca Hillman.  I’m sorry Karin and Kelsey. Game Over.

They forced me to give the crown up by knocking me unconcious, which was pretty cool cuz there was a huge duel.  I didn’t want to be called the Minister of Magic for nothing cuz I handled myself pretty well taking on at least everybody in the auditorium.  Spells were flying everywhere,  then Chuck showed up.  That is right, his last name is Norris and his first name is Chuck.  Chuck Norris.  I did a spell, he absorbed it in his beard, then roundhouse kicked my face. Game Over.

When I came to there was a Hypnotist right after the crowning for all to enjoy.  He did a pretty good job getting a lot of people to go under.

Afterwards there were pictures with all the new royaltee.  Then the DQ run, kinda.

Only Fellows and I made it there.  Karin and Kelsey got lost somewhere. I’m not sure what happened.

I then went home, got some stuff, and then set out for Madison at 10:30.  The ride home went really well, with me being pretty awake for the drive. No deer, bears, or moose to interfere with me and my destination. I listened to a mixed CD with a ton of different bands on it.  It’s pretty sweet.

Needless to say, I returned back safe and sound at 12:30.  Coronation was pretty fun and I’m pretty glad I came back just cuz it was fun seeing everybody again.

I was sitting at my computer and it was about 10:10 at night.  I was minding my own business doing some Visual Basic when all of a sudden the MSN conversation box pops up and some guy starts talking to me.  This guy’s name is Mike.  Anyway, he asked me if I wanted to play poker.

My reply was “Now?”

His reply, “Yes now”

I spent all of two seconds thinking to myself,  WWLD  (What would Lonie do)? That’s how I decide to do anything in life and look where it’s gotten me.  I’m unemployed, living in a  very little room with another guy.  Good grief.

Well, she’d say no, so I figured I’d better go do it. I was wearing shors and a t-shirt so i threw on some sweats and some warm headgear for the 30 second walk down to the TC (cafetaria/study area/do whatever you want are).

Before I left I typed “Ok, i’ll be there.”

I then headed out on this crazy walk to the tc.  It was so crazy that nothing really happened, but the thought of something happening made me feel like something really big was about to happen, tricking myself into thinking something was really going on.  A few minutes later I reached the buildiing.

I walked in and then started walking real slow and cool like, like I was listening to Bryce’s walking music from Kill Bill.  Through much, peeking around corners, jumping behind obstacles I eventually made it to the main room where everybody was playing poker.( i didn’t really do any of that)
The game didn’t go so great.  I started out winning some, but then lost 3-4 big hands on the river that really killed me. I lost them mostly to the same guy too.  His stack seemed to be mostly comprised of my chips, my…preciouses. Gollum*cough*! Gollum*cough*!

Well, I was the 2nd one out.  Didn’t really matter to me, I got rivered a few times so i felt like I played good, I just got screwed. I mean, i’d bet big so he’d fold, he’d call with a hand i had beat, and then Wham! Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in the face! He gets his card on the river.

I immediately left the party, making my way back up to the dorm.  Once back in my room I finished my VB.  I went to bed at 2.  Bill and Clayton came in and woke me up at 2:30.  They were very much awake and enjoying the night if you know what I mean.  They made another special appearance at 4 in the morning.  Clayton went to bed after a while, but Bill decided to warm up some salsa and He then started watching Oceans 11.  I feel asleep and when i woke up he was in bed, the tv was off, and so were the lights.
Game Over

The weirdest thing happened last night.  I went to bed before 1 in the morning.

Now, that may not sound too weird, but it is for me.  My normal bedtime is around 3.  That’s when the tv is turned off and we actually try to sleep.  Last night, all the lights were on, the tv was on, Bill was doing his homework, it was 12:30 and I was almost asleep.

I’ve had a cold the past week so I’ve been really tired lately, and last night I went up to the gym and played basketball for about an hour and a half.   Played 2 full court games with a bunch of guys, and then I shot around for a half an hour by myself.  I pulled off some pretty tight dunks as I was shooting all by myself.  One of the guys I played against was really good and he looked like the Russian boxer from Rocky.  I can’t really remember what that boxer looks like exactly, so maybe he really doesn’t, but I think he probably does.

Anyway, i’ve been playing basketball pretty regularly now so maybe it caught up to me or something.

I think the reason for this sudden tiredness is because I didn’t eat cereal yesterday morning.  All last semester I skipped breakfast but now I’ve been eating cereal most mornings.  That stuff, if i was popeye, is like my spinach.  That stuff, if i was mario, is like my star.  That stuff, if i was Legolas, is my elven bread.  It gives me focus, it gives me strength.  I denied my body cereal condeming it to tiredness.  Oh well, sucks to be it.

That long sleep is feeling pretty good right now.  And i ate cereal this morning so now i’m doubly ready for the day.  Step aerobics  today.  I say bring it on.

my shoulder really hurts too. a lot. Damn step aerobics.

wow, congratulations (ananymous hacker)! It must of took a real genious to hack this site. Even a novice encryprtion writer could figure out how to hack into David’s mainframe.

Who posted on Dave’s site? Must’ve re-wrote the encryptions after first re-routing them. Those encryptions.

Damn straight, hack it up