It's better than Hollywood, it's Mollywood

So confused!

22. May 2007 | Kategorie Uncategorized

About three or so weeks ago, Matt started acting different. He wasn’t very happy ever, and he kinda just closed up on me. Within those weeks, a lot has fallen apart. We have been going out for eight and a half months now, but I’m not sure how much longer we will go out. Here’s what happened…

I not really sure what happened, but something happened at school with some people that has got him depressed now. He doesn’t want to talk to me about it because he doesn’t want me to get involved. This is killing us however. He never want to hang out and when I talked to Fellows he told me not to worry and that he still likes me and that Matt just gets weird sometimes.

Well about a week or so ago, I went to one of his games and he totally blew me off. He would rather talk to everyone but me. Then once everyone left and it was just us, he went from happy to depressed. Every time we would chat, he’d get mad. Everything became my fault. I was telling him what to do, being inconsiderate and I guess to him I was just being a bad girlfriend. I tried to make him see the positive and I told him not to be so negative, but he’s like that’s just the way I am.

Then I read some of the songs he has written and they scare me. He has been writing songs about suicide and just with the whole personality change, it’s too much. I told him that his songs worry me, and he pulled one of those well if you don’t like my songs then you must not like the real me. I’m like no the real matt is the matt i have been dating for eight months not this new matt that has taken over.

Last Friday we did talk, we talked for a long time but nothing really got decided. He told me that I was mean before telling him that he was acting like a jerk (but he was, i was just frustrated and telling the truth!) and that he didn’t like that i didn’t like him and Candice being so close. (Annie tells me that she flirts with him all the time) I told him that i just didn’t appreciate them flirting. He told me that she starts it and that he doesn’t tell her to stop because he doesn’t want to hurt her feelings. I told him that if she was really his friend, she would understand. But he’s like whatever.

So today, we finally decided to break up. After being yelled at and fighting for a good two weeks, I finally gave up. He had been hinting at it for a while and it was me that was keeping us going. I just feel so bad, like i wasn’t helpful enough or something. I feel like i was a bad girlfriend, or not good enough. It’s so weird because a month ago, he seemed so mature and we seemed so good. Now he seems so young and almost immature and we are so over.

I don’t know what to do. I still really like him, and ending it was like dumping myself. Why does it have to be so unfair? Why can’t there just be no drama? I wish we could still be friends and that everything could be the same, but it never will be. I feel like I’ve not only lost Matt as a boyfriend, but also as a friend. He says he will still call and that he still wants to be friends, but he hardly called when we were going out, should i really be counting on that call? What do I do?

Comments (15)

15 Kommentare zu diesem Beitrag »

  1. Comment by Bryce Rausch | May 23, 2007 @ 11:34 am

    start drinking

  2. Comment by m!les | May 23, 2007 @ 1:35 pm

    I’m sorry, Molly. I think the best thing you can do for both of you is to just move on. With his change in behavior, you probably shouldn’t count on a call or visits or anything, and if he changes back and wants to get back together, then he can work like hell to earn your trust and appreciation back. Buy a pint of ice cream, rent White Chicks, and just the let the laughter take the pain away.

  3. Comment by Bryce Rausch | May 23, 2007 @ 7:29 pm

    Sub ice cream for Guinesse.

    And Miles is right, I personally think a big mistake would be after a week him being like, “yeah, thought about it, I’m so sorry baby” and you letting that be good enough, cause just wait a few weeks and you’ll see.

  4. Comment by Molly | May 23, 2007 @ 9:07 pm

    but, i miss him a lot, and if he changes back to the old matt, why not take him back?

  5. Comment by Holli | May 23, 2007 @ 10:45 pm

    because that would excuse his behavior

    I’m not going to give advice, but whatever decisions you make, make sure it’s what YOU want. Yes, you cared for him…but don’t forget how he’s treated you, and are you prepared for that to not be a one-time thing?

  6. Comment by Chris S | May 24, 2007 @ 5:14 pm

    I dont think you have to worry about his songs. They probably mean nothing. I just think he is copying the other music he listens too. Bands sing about that stuff. I dont know why but they do. Other than that I dont know what to say.

  7. Comment by Lindsey | May 26, 2007 @ 11:53 am

    If you have to fight for him to hear you, he isn’t ready to be a long-term boyfriend. Guys are always more immature than girls. Honestly, even though its hard to see, people you love that way in like high school might not really be what you need. I thought I would be with my second boyfriend forever, but it turns out the third one was it. Just have fun with friends for awhile, and see what comes your way, Maybe Matt will come around on his own later, but don’t look for it. He is the one who needs to decide to change, and I would say live your own life.

  8. Comment by Molly | May 26, 2007 @ 1:35 pm

    But just waiting for him is so hard! We have run into each other a lot and every time it hurts so much and i hate it a lot. He told me that he still would talk to me and still wanted to be friends but we haven’t said anything to each other since the break up, i hate that he lied like that, you know. Why do guys do that? its just makes it harder when he ignores me after he promised and gave me his word that he wouldn’t let us not be friends. I also looked on facebook and he’s already looking for a new relationship, WTF!! i just hate this, i think what makes it so hard is i ended it because i know that it had to be done, but i was the one who still wanted the relationship to work. Im the one getting hurt here.

  9. Comment by Bryce Rausch | May 26, 2007 @ 2:43 pm

    F*ck him. You’re better off and give it a few weeks and you’ll realize it. Don’t expect him to call, avoid places where he’ll be until you know you’re over him. I mean, I’m sure this whole promising to call thing wasn’t the first promise he broke to you. It’ll suck, but you have to be the bigger person and force yourself to have fun without him. Waiting around for him and sulking is natural but rarely makes things better.

  10. Comment by Lindsey | May 26, 2007 @ 4:33 pm

    I guess what I was trying to say, is that, even though everyone says it, you CAN’T be friends right now. Maybe later, when feelings aren’t hurt and emotions aren’t high. Basically, and it sounds weird, but you have to force yourself to forget him and have fun with other people. Is there someone else you thought was cute? Try flirting with him and/or focus on someone else. Even if you don’t eventually date him, it’s still fun to know that you can earn someone’s affection. I’m not saying be a whore, but, honestly, there must be someone cuter than Matt out there you’ve looked at before. And to clarify my earlier, don’t wait for him. I’m just saying if the future (like 6 months or more) brings Matt around, you can consider it. But, honestly, I’m not sure someone who is apathetic will actually change very quickly. If you want to talk to me, you can call me sometime – I’ve probably had more experience from the girl’s perspective on break-ups and stuff than most people who read this. I broke up with a guy I was crazy about in high school because he wouldn’t change his drug habit. Just don’t call tonight, it’s my crazy Philadelphia bachelorette party and I won’t be able to talk.

  11. Comment by david | June 5, 2007 @ 8:20 pm

    little late so who knows what is going on now, but girls do the same thing as far as the promise to call thing. I don’t think you have any reason to feel like a bad girfriend. You tried and did what you can but his ignorance or whatever killed everything you guys had. A relationship takes two people working together. Not a babysitter and little boy who is constantly crying and whining about things. (your the babysitter 🙂 I’d agree with everyone else about the moving on thing. It’ll take time to get over it but you will in time as impossible as that may seem.

  12. Comment by Amy Jo | June 7, 2007 @ 5:57 pm

    I’m late too. I agree you can’t be friends. At least not for awhile. The friends thing never works out especially when you have dated that person for a long time in which you have. You just got to move on. You are still in high school so you have time. And don’t go back to him. That makes it worse. I know these things (I dealt with a very similar situation).

  13. Comment by Molly | June 7, 2007 @ 9:21 pm

    Thanks guys, you’ve been really helpful

  14. Comment by Bryce Rausch | June 10, 2007 @ 6:35 pm

    Rumor has it you are already over him. Good for you grl frnd

  15. Comment by Molly | June 10, 2007 @ 11:54 pm

    what rumors?

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